It’s been a rough week full of tough decisions and its only Thursday! I’ve missed my last two group therapy appointments and I’m in serious need of some one on one with my therapist, luckily I have an appointment tomorrow. I’ve been avoiding someone close to me, because their lifestyle is toxic to me and despite the fact that I’ve asked repeatedly for some boundaries to be in place, this person refuses to show me even a modicum of respect.
It is absolutely heartbreaking to think that I might be losing a friend that I’ve grown to love so very much, but at the end of the day I must take care of myself. I’ve spent the last four years living in this dark hole of a life and as I try my hardest to pull myself out…I cannot allow anyone to hinder my growth. On the other hand, a true friend wouldn’t be so blatantly disrespectful, would they?
I mean, if I don’t set boundaries for myself and the people I allow in my life, I will only be putting myself back into that little people pleasing box, running around on auto pilot that has put me so far into the darkness I’m so desperately trying to escape. I want to enjoy what’s left of my life and I can’t do that if I continue to permit someone to consistently disrespect me. We tell each other all the time not to let our lovers do it, but we rarely approach the subject of friends. Sadly, that’s where I am right now and its a bridge I have avoided crossing for the better part of the past six months. *sighs*
pose: Ardent Poses – Content