Posted in Catwa, Events, Fashion, Gingerfish Poses, Maitreya, Phedora, Phoenix, Second Life

This Is NOT a Golden Shower

Sometimes I get on these creative highs and I just can’t stop. I might take six pictures in a day, spend the next day editing…then I’ve got photos and rarely have anything in mind to write. So, I’ll reach out to random friends and ask their opinions or sometimes even a topic. This morning was no different. I’m staring at the photo. I like it. I’m rather proud of it. I had some artistic vision and I managed to see it through. I kinda know what it makes me feel, but I don’t want to talk about that just yet. Its too raw.
Oh look, my dear friend Dusty Wasp is online. I’ll ask him. Afterall, he’s given me songs for photos before and they always worked out great. So, I pass him the photo and ask for help. And this asshole (yeah, I said it) says to me, “given the suggestive setting and the golden hues…” and this is where he stops to chuckle…”yeah, I’ll just leave it at that.”
DUSTY MF’N WASP! THIS IS NOT A GOLDEN SHOWER!!

God, I love my friends!♥

acid rain wash my heart
Fuck you, Dusty!

wearing:
hair: :::Phoenix::: Brittany Hair (*new* @ Mainstore)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica
(Yummy) Bohemia Ring Set
Phedora / Soley set / 28 C v2 (*new* @ FrouFrou)

pose: GingerFish Poses – Bad at Love (*new* @ eBENTO)

scene:
E.V.E Dancing Poison Rain {Silver}
E.V.E {Poison Rain} Synapses Fishes [M02-W]
E.V.E {Poison Rain} Synapses Fishes [M02-R]
E.V.E {Poison Rain} Synapses Fishes [M02-B]

Posted in Catwa, Collabor88, Events, Fashion, Foxcity, Lybra, Pretty Mess, Second Life

Be The Reason

None of us are perfect and most of us live with our share of regrets. I usually say that I have no regrets, because I am where I am because of everything that’s happened to me to get me here. However, that’s not really true. Regardless of where the path had led, if there were things I could go back and change, I would. I would undo the pain I’ve caused others. I would have treated myself better over the years and demanded better from others.
It took me a long time to get to a place where I felt I had a reason to live. You see for the longest time, I wanted to die almost every day. I have my reasons for wanting the sweet comfort of the final act, but I also have my reasons for staying alive. There are days that I struggle with both sides of that coin, but someone always finds a way to remind me why its so good that I am still here.
The first thing I had to do was forgive myself. I think that is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It’s really easy for me to forgive others. I’m really good at letting go (though I wasn’t always). The thing is we can’t really move through our lives without hurting people from time to time. We don’t always mean to hurt others and we rarely set out to hurt ourselves, but when we carry around toxic thoughts and feelings, that’s exactly what we do. We hurt ourselves.
There’s a song that most of you all know, “The Reason” by Hoobastank. This song came out when I was making some major life changes and it became somewhat of an anthem for me. Its a song that I sing to myself and yes, sometimes I actually sing it to myself in the mirror, because there’s no greater reason to change than to change for yourself. Don’t wait for someone else to fix you….be the reason you change and those changes will be yours that no one can take from you. Forgive yourself and be the reason to treat yourself better than anyone else ever could. You’ll be surprised how many people follow suit and started treating you better, too.

getting close
Thank you, Aaron. ♥

Aaron is wearing:
FLite. -Trucker Cap
hair: CATWA HEAD Daniel
ears: Stretched ears-Omimi- [MANDALA]
body: [Signature] Gianni – Body
SIG GIANNI Size – CARSON Hoodie by ColdAsh

wearing:
hair: Exile – Wildfire (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica
(Yummy) Bohemia Ring Set
LYBRA . SORANA

pose: FOXCITY. Close (*new* @ Shop Your Heart Out By Linden Labs)

PM & Vibes – Neon Studio Apartment

Posted in Catwa, Collabor88, Events, FaMESHed, Fashion, Maitreya, Rebel Hope, Second Life, shopping

You’ll See Me Return

Sometimes when I get in the zone of taking photos like I did yesterday, I will turn on one of my youtube playlists and let the music guide me through my personal maze of creativity. This song has been a favorite of mine for so very long. With yesterday being Valentine’s day and finding out that my RL husband has a new girlfriend was uhm….how can I put this delicately? Yeah, there’s not a way, so I’ll just leave it here like a lead weight and you can imagine for yourself. So, while I didn’t link the entire song’s lyrics….yes, it is still mostly a music post.

“And I never meant to hurt you
I swear I didn’t mean
Those things I said
I never meant to do that to you
Next time I’ll keep my hands to myself instead
Oh, does she love you
What do you want to do?
Does she need you like I do?
Do you love her?
Is she good for you?
Does she hold you like I do?
Do you want me?
Should I leave?
I know you’re always telling me
That you love me
Just sometimes I wonder If I should believe
Oh, I love you God,
I love you
I’d kill a dragon for you
I’ll die”
~Sinead O’Connor Troy

GiaRewind Cosmetics
You should’ve left the light on

wearing:
*LODE* Head Accessory – Juliet [iceberg]
hair: Stealthic – Passion (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier
Bossie. Y2K eyeshadows  (*new* @ REWIND)
Bossie. Y2K lipsticks & gloss (*new* @ REWIND)
EF: Majesty Choker (*new* @ FaMESHed)
!Rebel Hope – Gia Mesh Dress (*new* @ FaMESHed)

pose is just from my AO

Posted in Bound Box, Events, Fashion, Foxcity, Kustom9, Maitreya, Mina Hair, Narcisse, ON9, Pale Girl Productions, Second Life, Seven Emporium

Cupid Is a Rapist

So, what’s the deal with Cupid? We chose the God of Date Rape as our symbol for Valentine’s Day? Who makes these decisions? I can bet it wasn’t Gloria Alfred! Okay, calm your tits, I’m just being the asshole on Valentine’s Day because this time last year I was happy it was annoying…*laughs.* So, I’m here to spoil the mood this year or at least twist it around a  bit. Wait, there’s logic to this….just listen. So, cupid, this lil fuckers just goes about shooting people with an arrow that takes away their free will…forcing them to feel desire. Ok, Cupid Cosby, that’s not creepy at all! I tell ya what, Cupid….I’m ready for you….shoot me and I’m ready to shoot back. I’m not going to take your free will, though. You can will it all you want, it’s not going to work again. *grins*

cupid is a rapist

wearing:
Foxcity. Smitten Wreath (*gift* @ Shop Your Heart Out By Linden Labs)
hair: MINA – Maddie (*new* @ Kustom9)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
Bossie. Y2K eyeshadows  (*new* @ REWIND)
Bossie. Y2K lipsticks & gloss (*new* @ REWIND)
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier
tattoo: .Identity. Body Shop – Reborn Stronger
Narcisse– Keely Harness (February Bound Box)

pose: FOXCITY. Cupid Bento Pose Set (*new* @ ON9)

7 – Lets Get Physical Neon PINK – Solid

Posted in Animals, Apple Fall, Catwa, Collabor88, Cynful, Events, FaMESHed, Fancy Decor, Fashion, Home Decor, Jian, Maitreya, RunAway Hair, Second Life, shopping, The Liaison Collaborative

Waking Up

I feel like I’m just waking up to a tornado of lists. I’ve been hard at work on this picture all day. I had it all done and edited. Inserted the photo, was listing the credits and realized that my painting over the fireplace was backwards. No wonder that picture didn’t make sense to me. *giggles* Luckily everything was still in place, including me. So, yeah, that’s all I’ve got to say about it, cuz my head is still swimming like crazy. I’ll be doubling down on blogging, so I can only guess what sort of madness is headed your way from me.

waking up

 

wearing:
hair:  [RA]  Sady Hair (*new* @ C88) squeeeee!
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica (*new* @ Kinky)
[Cynful]  Rainy Baby – Hoodie + Panty Set (*new* @ C88)

JIAN Beagle Pup (Nov Luxe Box)

pose:  Bauhaus Movement – Hearts Burst Into Fire Poses (*new* @ TLC)

Fancy Decor: Jansen Collection (*new* @ FaMESHed)
-Fancy Decor: Cube Table
-Fancy Decor: Velvet Swivel Chair (black)
-Fancy Decor: Jansen Candles
-Fancy Decor: Jansen Painting

Fancy Decor: Fulton Coffee Table
Fancy Decor: Fulton Rug
Fancy Decor: Triangle Candle (black)
Fancy Decor: Gray Vase
Fancy Decor: White Vase
Fancy Decor: Black Vase
Fancy Decor: Brush Art
Fancy Decor: Books & Bookends (black & gold)
Fancy Decor: Pillar Fireplace (white)

tres blah– Hodgepodge – Stacked Magazines

MudHoney Carter Entertainment Center Set (*new* @ FaMESHed)
-MudHoney Trophy Bowl
-MudHoney Basket Vase
-MudHoney Bent Candlesticks
-MudHoney Stone Pyramid

PILOT – Book and Tablet Stack
PILOT – Fido [Carbon]

Ariskea [Ophelia] Fake Plant (*new* @ FaMESHed)

Alouette – Antique TV Bookcase (#2)

Apple Fall Huge Fan Palm

Posted in Catwa, Chic Moda, Events, FaMESHed, Fashion, Home Decor, pr!tty, Second Life, shoes, shopping, The Liaison Collaborative, unKindness

Clear The Haze

I don’t even remember taking this picture or editing it. I know I took it last week…day one of being sick, I believe. As, today is Day 7 of the flu, I have to say this is the best I’ve felt in a week. I’m still not back to myself yet, I’m certainly glad to be on the mend.  What I can tell you about the last seven days is that they’ve been a complete blur. I remember talking on skype to a friend of mine and trying to explain that each day had many days inside it. That made complete sense to me at the time and sadly, I am still sick enough to get exactly what I was trying to say. Well, yes, I have been heavily medicated and you’d think that would have made it a bit more enjoyable, but no. The best part was being asleep. I got lots of sleep and the waking moments were often surreal. This morning has been a complete whirlwind already…wish this lil kitten luck as I clear the haze of this past week and get caught up.♥

smoke & magic

wearing:
hair:  pr!tty – Demy – :rigged: (*new* @ Coven)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica

[ kunst ] – Cigarette & holder #1 (mouth)
=Zenith=Cosy long Gloves – Maitreya

ChicModa // Ara Dress // Lara
Pure Poison – Love Pumps(*new* @ FaMESHed)

pose:  Bauhaus Movement – Hearts Burst Into Fire Poses (*new* @ TLC)
uK – Kitten- Black Bed (*new* @ Kinky)

Posted in Catwa, Collabor88, Cynful, Events, Fashion, Foxcity, RunAway Hair, Second Life, shopping

My Cup

I have been on my death bed for…well, today is day 6 and I swear this has to end soon or I’m going insane for sure. I was gonna try to write about how blessed I am and how my cup runneth over, but I’m not feeling so blessed right now. At the moment, I’m feeling like fresh road kill that’s still twitching. So, the only thing in my cup right now is cold meds, juice, soup, more cold meds, tea…DEATH.
So, yeah, I don’t have a lot to say except, “KMN!”

my cup

wearing:
hair:  [RA]  Shelby Hair (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane
#17 Sintiklia  – Sweet berry – Choker white
(Yummy) Bohemia Ring Set
[Cynful] Lucid Dream – Bra + Panty set (*new* @ FrouFrou)

I can’t tell you what Leric was wearing, because he’s a butthead and won’t answer questions. I really appreciate his company and his help with this shot.

pose: FOXCITY.. You’re My Cuppa Tea (*new* @ Shop Your Heart Out By Linden Labs)

Posted in Catwa, Events, FaMESHed, Fashion, Foxcity, Gos, Home Decor, Lybra, Maitreya, Mina Hair, Second Life

Spank Me

Alright, calm down, I’m not literally asking all of you to come spank me. As much as I do love a good spanking…*blushes*…its just that this dress from Lybra really makes you want to drop something in front of that person you have a crush on, so you gotta bend over and hope that they like what they see. Ok, yeah, maybe I sound like a cat in heat, but whatever you want to call it, we know its going to get someone’s attention. Oh don’t act so coy, you know you know what I’m talking about. I’ve been wanting to do a pose like this with a belt in my mouth and had a hard time finding anything quite like I wanted. Low and behold, ask and ye shall be granted goodness in thy name as called upon the great designer, Lybra Rage, the designer behind Quasi. Not only did he love my request but he made the belt and named it after me. It even comes with a hud. So, with all the Valentine’s stuff going around, the KinkyEvent, the Fetish Fair, not to mention all our favorite regular events like FaMESHed….well, there’s never been no shortage on flirty, sexy, and fun items on the grid. So, when you get done staring at my ass…yeah, I see you….go shopping and get yourself all dolled up for the upcoming day of lovers!♥
As for me? Some couple have Netflix and chill? I have tumblr and toys. *grins*

spank me
How’s that for a hump day post? <eg>

wearing:
hair:  MINA – Audrie  (*new* @ Fetish Fair)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica (*new* @ Kinky)
Quasi – Sadystika Belt
LYBRA . ELVIRA (*new* @ FaMESHed)
[Gos] Lady G Platform Pumps  (*new* @ FaMESHed)

pose: FOXCITY. Bad Kitty VOL2 Bento Pose Set

scene:
:CP: Dove Bench
[Commoner] Break-Up Survival Kit / Personal Massager
Dutchie maledom chair 2.0

Posted in Apple Fall, Catwa, Events, FaMESHed, Fashion, Foxcity, Home Decor, Maitreya, pr!tty, Second Life, Shiny Shabby, shopping, unKindness

Cupid Threw Up

OMG! Cupid threw up all over the grid! Fuck it, he threw up all over the damn world. You can hardly go anywhere in SL or RL without being flooded in various shades of pink and red, not to mention all the hearts. Second Life will be no exception, especially considering how many people get married and partnered every other week. I’m not judging…I swear. >.>
I happen to love hearts. Just the shape of them and I have a huge heart with lots of love to share. However, I’m not an especially romantic person. I always knew there were different types of love, but it was only a recent discussion with a friend that taught me that these different types of loves have names. So, off I went seeking some knowledge on the four types of love: Eros, Agape, Phileo, and Storge. I actually found a really great blog on the subject that is aptly titled: Four Kinds of Love; Eros, Agape, Phileo, & Storge. So, if you’re like me and looking for a different way to celebrate a holiday with history as interesting as the different types of love, try some light reading on both subjects. I know I plan to do some more reading and who knows, I might even end up writing more about it.
If you are looking to decorate & celebrate, there’s no shortage of lovely Valentine themed items to be found. You can start at FaMESHed where you’ll find this lovely bedroom suit that offers both gray and pink versions of several items, as well as a lovely free gift to those in the FaMESHed Update group. Plus, Vinyl made the cutest little babydoll top with shorts and named it after me….I was so surprised and honored, as I have been a long time fan of the store. So, make sure you check that out…just think you can wear me! Sorta…lol.

vday

wearing:
hair:  pr!tty – Tory (*new* @ Gacha Garden)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica (*new* @ Kinky)
Vinyl – Sugar Sady Babydoll (*new* @ FaMESHed)

pose: FOXCITY. Me Time Bento Pose Set

scene:
uk – That’s Amore Bedroom Set (*new* @ FaMESHed)
-uK – That’s Amore Adult Bed
-uK – That’s Amore Grey Storage Ottoman
-uK – That’s Amore Nightstand
-uK – That’s Amore Dresser
-uK – That’s Amore Flower Basin
-uK – That’s Amore Ruffled Rug Pink

!gO! Be mine – Berti (*new* @ Shiny Shabby)
!gO! Be mine – Liv & Lou RARE (*new* @ Shiny Shabby)

Silence. – Flower Heart
Silence. – Heart with Arrow

{what next} Hearts Alarm Clock (ivory)

dust bunny . olive branch heart

Kalopsia – Dark Heart Lantern

 

Posted in Catwa, Cynful, Events, FaMESHed, Fashion, Klubwerk.poses, Maitreya, Phoenix, Second Life

Stone Cold

I’ve talked about how I protect my heart by choosing the people I know will break my heart, because I know what to expect. Here’s the thing though. It almost sounds like I don’t love these people, but I do. I just have serious trust issues. I don’t even trust my own mother and I know that no one on this planet loves me more than she does. It’s better when they leave me in the end, because I know what a mess I am. I know that I’m impossible to completely love. I don’t say that for pity or for people to argue with me. I know its an automatic inclination for people to say, “Oh, Sady, that’s not true.” Here’s the thing. It IS true. None of you really know me. You only know bits and pieces. I think its not so hard for my friends to love me, because our time together is limited. Plus, I am pretty awesome, I’ll admit that. However, romantic love? I’m not so sure that’s really in the cards for me. I let myself believe it from time to time, but I know in the end they all leave….even the good ones. So, it is from experience that I protect my heart by keeping it stone cold. I’m truly happy when someone I love finds happiness, even when its not with me, as much as it hurts. Please don’t make that face of pity or sadness, I’ll be fine. This is my life and I know it well. I’m not an unhappy person. I accept my fate and I make the most of it.

stone cold
Stone cold, baby
God knows I tried to feel
Happy for you
Know that I am, even if I
Can’t understand, I’ll take the pain
Give me the truth, me and my heart
We’ll make it through
If happy is her, I’m happy for you

wearing:
hair:  :::Phoenix::: Kathleen Hair (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –- MaryJane – Catwa Mesh Head Applier – Jamaica (*new* @ Kinky)
[Cynful] Alvena’s Leather Strap Dress (*new* @ Fetish Fair)

pose: KlubWerK.poses – Madison set